The question then becomes when do you have a ¾ life crisis???? It is when you are too old to have a mid life crisis of course. Think of it this way if I am 55 and am not going to live to 110 (trust me on that one) then how can I be having a mid life crisis? In fact if I have some shot at living to 73, I plan on making that # then I would be truly into a ¾ life crisis. The good news is that I am not sure I am in a ¾ life crisis but the signs certainly point to it.
What might be some signs one might be in a ¾ life crisis:
When you go to the Doctor you are the oldest one in the waiting room.
Everyone, I mean everyone calls you sir.
People start holding the door open for you and give you a look like, what a handsome older gentleman. Change the last part if you think that may not be what they are thinking.
You may have ED and don’t care.
You have to write down everything that ails you so won’t forget anything when you get to the doctor.
The only thing the doctor gets excited about is that your Triglycerides are the highest she has ever seen.
You take not one kind of Cholesterol medicine but two.
You have a private bin at CVS.
You actually have 3 doctor appointments during one week, two planned and one unplanned.
You know your customer care rep by name at your insurance company, and they are actually nice and helpful because they feel sorry for you.
When you are in the waiting room you choose to read the AARP magazine.
Your doctor starts everything they say with “Well at Your Age”.
You can’t get all your prescriptions in your pocket anymore.
You have to have a line item in your budget for insurance co pays.
Insurance benefits at your job are more important than the job itself, and one major illness can ruin you financially.
When you go to a job interview you take a form letter from your lawyer that reminds the company that age discrimination is illegal.
Your friends, (Paul W more than any) remind you that you should be retiring at your age.
The waiter at Denny’s insists you get the Senior Slam and does not ID you to make sure you are old enough. When you suggest they call it the Champion Menu (golfers will get that) they think you have really lost your mind.
Your kids call to check in on you to see how you are feeling. God love em we do have that going for us.
I am sure there is more, I just can’t think of them.
More to come, unfortunately
Lonny
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2 comments:
The best thing about being old is the Wednesday senior discount on liquor at Big Daddy's. They don't even card us old guys for the discount. PS - 8 days to go.
Once again, I sent my pithy comments on this topic only to watch them disappear. I rememember most of what I said, but I probably will never match the greatness of how I said it. Basically I commented about how I find it strange when young people talk about getting old. Even in my advanced years i feel pretty good. I can still outrun most 18 year olds and I was born during the Truman administration. This is more a condemnation of 18 year olds rather than how fast this old man is. I take my vitamins and a pill a day for my acid reflux condition. So you whippersnappers njoy yourself more and forget about the aging process. The alternative is not attractive.
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